Court-Records: An Ace Attorney Fansite

Important information about this in-development beta

phoenix wright vs santa claus

Chapter 2: dasher

PHOENIX WRIGHT VS SANTA CLAUS

10:00PM

DASHER

phoenix got out of his shiny car and he and santa stepped out to the gorman racetrack

"so dasher said hes here" said phoenix

"yes" said santa

"i hope he wasnt taken as a racehorse by the gorman brothers" said phoenix

"ho ho, dont be silly my boi, its christmas, people dont work on chr-"

"SHES A WINNAH!" shouted a voice and people cheered in victory as they won money from their bets

"I MUST SAY, GORMAN B, OUR DEAR DASHELLE IS QUITE FAST" said a voice over the speakers

"DAM RIGHT GORMAN W, THEY JUST KEEP ON BETTIN AND THEY KEEP WINNIN"

"PERHAPS WE SHOULD RAISE THE MINIMUM BET ON HER"

so they raised the bet on the horse dashelle to 100000 DOLLERS and people still bet on her

"wow this dashell horse must b amazin" said santa "anyway back to searching for dasher"

they crossed the racetrack to ask the gorman brothers the owners of the racetrack when suddenly A HORSE ALMOST RAN OVER THEM AND IT FELL AND ALL THE OTHER HORSES RAN PAST

"OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO MAH SHIIIIIT" shouted gorman b as all the other horses ran to the finishing line "ITS A TURNABOUT BOIS! DASHELL LOSES TO SNAILEY! DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMN"

everyone got pissed off cause they lost all their money on that bet and everyone left while the gorman brothers swam in the money

"ohhhhh yeah, thank u mr wright" said the gorman brother wearing black "not often i say thanks but really you made us LOTSA money cause of ur dumbassness"

"yes, your work is appreciated" said the gorman brother in white (ill just call em b and w now) tossing a coin

"yeah hi, were looking for a raindear named dasher"

"dammmmn we dunno who ya talkin about" said b "but i tell ya, dashelle is a great horse, ya shud bet on her at the next race"

"what next race" said santa "all those naughty gamblers left"

"ohhhh shiiiit..." said b

"mmm yes, that does appear to be a flaw in this lucky outcome" said w

"hey phoenix bet on her will ya" said b

"but i dont have 100000 dollers"

"ooooo" said b

"gorman, we must consider an alternative plan" said w and they got together and whispered suspiciously

"hey santa" said phoenix

"yes mah boi"

"dont u think dashelles name sounds REALLY familiar?"

"yes it sounds like dasher- oh ho ho ho mah boi dasher is a REINDEER and hes also a guy"

"oh true"

just then the gorman brothers came back to em

"tell ya wat phenix, well let this bet be free just this one time" said b

"so please, bet away, which horse do you want my good man" said w

"hmmmm" phoenix thought "i think i want snailey"

"RIGHT AWAY" shouted black

and then the horses all lined up and the gun fired and they all started running

"YEA COME ON SNAILY U CAN BEET EM" shouted phoenix even tho dashelle already won

"shiiiiit what" shouted phoenix

"that is why u SHOULD NOT GAMBLE" shouted santa putting phoenixs name back on the naughty list

"OHOHOHOHO" laughed b but thats when phoenix saw dashell fall over tired

"GEDDUP DASHELL, U GOT MORE RACES TO WIN"

"wait santa look" phoenix pointed at dashell "shes got... a DICK"

santa slapped him

"OWWW WHAT"

"A GOOD BOI DOESNT LOOK AT LADYS DICKS" shouted santa

"but santa this means shes not a girl"

"A GOOD BOI DOES NOT ASSUME GENDERS" shouted santa

"oh come on, dont u find this suspicious"

"hmmmmm now that u mention it" said santa "she doesnt exactly look like a horse at all"

"WOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH" shouted phoenix "IT MUST BE DASHER"

"but how we get her back"

"hmmmmmm" thought phoenix "ok lets sneak into the stable"

"good plan"

so they waited for the gorman brothers to lock the horses in the stable and climbed in through the window

"hey there a dasher around here" said phoenix

just then dashelle ran up to santa and said sorry to him

"ohai dasher" said phoenix "ok lets get out-"

"HA HA AH HA HA HA" laughed the booming voice on GORMAN B

"get out of here gorman, u stole santas reindeer" said phoenix

"please be a good boi and let us leave" said santa

"TRESPASSERS" shouted gorman b "that horse belongs to gorman, but hey im generous, lets have a race"

"ok" said phoenix

"but if i win" said gorman b "YOU GOTTA BE MY HORSES FOR THE REST OF UR LIVES"

"OOO NO" shouted phoenix

they tried to tame dasher but he was insane and wouldnt let him on

"fuck, better go with another one" said nick and he got on a small brown horse

===THE BIG RACE===

"good luck b" said w

"kick his ass mah boi" said santa

"my horse is no ass ill have ya know" shouted b showin off his big white horse and the pistol started the race

they ran to beat each other the small phoenix horse was much faster than he seemed but the white horse was faster

phoenix tried to give the horse carrots to speed it up but he kept crashing into barrels and santas annoyin voice like "dats the way" "heere we ho" "ho ho ho" made him slow down probably mentally too

and white horse won

"YEAEAEAEAHHHH" shouted gorman b "you SUCK! HAVE FUN BEIN HORSEY FOR THE REST OF LIFE" shouted b

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO" shouted phoenix but santa stepped to him

"give us another chance" said santa

"ha alright" said black gettin back on the horse

"phoenix gimme that carrot you got" whispered santa

"ok why"

santa took the carrot and gave it to dasher

and he was friendly again

"woaaaah damn, u did it" said phoenix and he got on dasher

3

2

1

BANG

dasher ran past the white horse instantly

"WHAAAAAAAAAAT" shouted b "YOU TAMED DASHELLE?! OH NOT ON ME WATCH"

and he pressed a button and WINGS CAME OUT OF THE HORSES SIDES AND IT FLEW OVER THE RACETRACK

"OH NO" shouted phoenix but he considered the situation and got an idea

he hit dasher on the side and tug him upwards

AND HE FLEW TOO

they flew over the racetrack past bs horse and landed and went through the line finishing the race

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO" screamed gorman b and he and w lost their disguises

they were actually guy in black and guy in white, asshole and gentleman criminals (theyre from drdigertz vs barrylawn turnabout BITTER RIVALRY if u wanna see their first fic)

"hmmm, this is a problem" said white "but we will be back, as they say"

and they jumped away into the dark night sky

and then dasher flew over phoenixs head and END OF CHAPTER appeared like in paper mario (but only the ones that matter)

TO BE CONTINUED